As time going, I grow up. And I even don't have enough time to think about that. I just grow up. Go to work at 7:00am, get back home at 17:00pm everyday. When I am on the bus every morning, listenning to the vedio, watching the moving people, I always think what we are searching for, what we are pursuing. It seems that everybody is busing. They are all walking fast. Some looks twinkling, some looks tired.From one of my feet steps into the oiffice, a new work day is beginning.Sit before the computer, reply some e-mails ,suf the Internet and sometimes read books in case of falling behind.This is not the life I want.But I just sit here and do nothing.I don't what to do and how to do. Think about these things leaves me nothing but waste some of my brain cells.One of my classmates works in an Insure company.She is much harder than me. She has to work overtime everyday and even on the weekends. So she doesn't wont to stay there any longer.But she can't leave now.Because leaving means she has to find a new job. A new suitable job is not easy to find under this condition. She has to endure that.She always call me to relieve her feelings.What is wrong with us? What is wrong with our life? We work hard everyday never stop learning new things in case of falling behind. However, we don't feel that happy.Why? I dont know, maybe one head is not enough to think about these questions.hehe..
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This morning when I was surfing the Internet, I saw one of friends said, she has a photo of his mother which was taken when her mother was five. These makes me think of my father.This seems impossible but I really don't have any photo of my father.I don't know his birthday, don't know what he likes,don't kbow whether he is happy to have my younger sister and me, don't know whether he hates me because I leave him alone...When I was a little girl, I don't like my dad,he smoked a lot, drink a lot and queralled with mum a lot .Sometimes he even called us some bad names.At that time, I thought I hated him I would not feel sad if he left us.But I was wrong.I was badly badly wrong.Now I want him to talk with me ,even scold at me. However he would not give me a chance, he just left,left mum and us alone, went to the heaven.I grew up in the country, the condition is not good,even so I have a happy childhood.I had father and mother to accompany me. We didn't have much money, but we were happy.And sometimes dad is humorous.He would tell stroties if the electricity was cut. He was loath to eat and keep anything good for us.He really loved me.This is the biggest pity in my life that dad left before I learned what parental love is.I wish I were 8 years old again, so I can take care of my father.Now I am capable to make money, but I can't buy clothes, shoes,wanderful meals for my father. Buying things for my father is my dream when I was a young girl. A dream can never be come true.Dad would never know this. I think he will be happy if he knows these.I feel guilty so I never be brave enough to see my father, he just lied there,I've no idea if he is happy now ,if he have a sensible daughter now.She must be pretty and know how to care father,dad must be happier than before.Dad, I knew I have done many things wrong,can you forgive me? I love you,dad.love you very much, I hope you can hear me, can you?
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I am 22 years old. In the old China, a girl like me maybe have several babies,hahaa... Someone told me I should get married. I donnot know. I think I am too young to get married. I don't want to be tied with a family at this time. I don't want to lose freedom. Now I get a job in this city and probably live in this city all my life. Marry a good boy and work hard to earn money and then have a baby.This will be my life but shuold not be now. Now I want to have my own space.Love?Actually, I cannot quite understand this word.What is love?Have I met with my lover, the one who will take care of me all my life?I don't know.But I have a boyfriend.He would love to marry me. However, I cannot make my mind. This is not fair to him ,I know.What should I do?Oh, it is a terrible pronlem, I have to leave it to time. So just wait,be patient!Time can tell me something.Wait...
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Now I'm going to graduate from college. Actually, I don't know how I feel now.Find a good job is not easy here in China. I hope I can do good in the Accounting Firm. This job will do good to my future career. With enough work experience, I can apply for a higher position in some exllent companies.So I must work hard now and keep me in high spirits to work efficently.Wish me have a bright future!Go! Go! Go!
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