Lonesomeness

The twilight was in the offing, (it had already started getting dark), when I started driving to the beach. I moved towards the rock where I was used to sitting. No, I do not get scared if the darkness even prevails the atmosphere, I rather feel close to the Nature. That day I was in gloom, (without any reason, and it is usual for me, I do not need any reason to be sad or happy). I heard the wind blowing as if it had started crying seeing me in gloom. I wanted to sit on the rock and to watch the white stripe on the horizon. It had not gotten dark yet. As the sheet of the darkness was getting thicker, the stars became brighter and brighter. I stared at the stars, as I wanted to find a special one, the one belonged to me, the one created for me.

"Why isn’t there any one for me. My heart is full of love, full of warmth but inside I am still lonely. Why I am lonely in the crowd of all human species wandering on the beach, and now drifting away because it is getting dark. Maybe they are afraid of darkness, but why I like it. May be because it hides me from the eyes of the onlookers."

It was getting cold and before I started freezing, I stood up and moved where my car was parked. I immediately got into the car, the atmosphere inside started to warming me up. I started feeling relaxed. I did not know when I reached home, fell on the bed and got asleep.

Sometimes, we look for lonesomeness. That kind of lonesomeness is our free will when we need to feel inner peace. It doesn't hurt or harm us. In the opposite, it's like recharging our batteries.
In those moments, we don't need to speak to someone and we don't need anyone by our side. Those moments are made only for ourself.
Daily life demands a lot. Sometimes, we only work as if we are just robots, that's why we appreciate self-chosen lonesomeness, from time to time.

But also sometimes, we feel uncompleted, so we look for someone we belong to.
Although we are happy with our life, an inner longing remains. We always have a feeling of having missed something or someone in life. We are always looking for somewhat or someone that fills out a kind of empty we feel deep inside. I am afraid we never will find absolute satisfaction. We are eternal seekers.

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Comments

Mayumi August 4, 2019 10:10

The way you tell the story is very effective as if I'm watching a scene in a movie. Very vivid and descriptive. I feel the loneliness of the character.
Laura n Dana1 August 2, 2019 14:42

I was glad to read your writing. I could feel the atmosphere around you. In my case, I might have learned English to fill up my inner deep empty.
- Mishaikh > Laura n Dana1 August 2, 2019 16:46
  
  I am glad you find my blog worthy to fill up your inner deep.........heart.
Esma August 2, 2019 2:57

hey freind,

what i understood from your blog is that you need a companian in your life? : D
Mishaikh July 31, 2019 13:03

O,M.

Thanks. You know, Once a nice member of our MyEC remarked. I CAN MELT THE HEART OF GIRLS.

This was her remarks, but I do not consider myself on that level.
O. M. July 31, 2019 2:06

Mishaikh )) You are romantic with your heart full of love ))) Nice description of the fresh evening at the beach. I would really like to be able to write as you do.

Well, I have recently read that we are never alone but part of the whole. I only can't assume why then we feel loneliness...

Thanks for sharing. I loved reading it.
Rose July 30, 2019 19:14

Sometimes, we look for lonesomeness. That kind of lonesomeness is our free will when we need to feel inner peace. It doesn't hurt or harm us. In the opposite, it's like recharging our batteries.
In those moments, we don't need to speak to someone and we don't need anyone by our side. Those moments are made only for ourself.
Daily life demands a lot. Sometimes, we only work as if we are just robots, that's why we appreciate self-chosen lonesomeness, from time to time.

But also sometimes, we feel uncompleted, so we look for someone we belong to.
Although we are happy with our life, an inner longing remains. We always have a feeling of having missed something or someone in life. We are always looking for somewhat or someone that fills out a kind of empty we feel deep inside. I am afraid we never will find absolute satisfaction. We are eternal seekers.
- Mishaikh > Rose July 31, 2019 13:01
  
  I remember once I used to call myself as HERMIT.
  
  Thanks Rose for being so considerate. I always feel my writings are not going waste when I find readers like you around.
hayat :) July 30, 2019 14:01

We are no longer in touch with our humanity . That's is an outcome of modern technology . We have everything but we are disconnected and lonely .we are deprived from enjoying nature , which, is a special trait of our human existence . Your blog is full of a meditative description of nature as a refugee . Nevertheless , the sense of loneliness wasn't that easy to defeat .
We are stranger and miserable though we have almost all facilities of living and we can't escape our sadness . As the famous Arabic saying declare " one can't step into heaven if no humans are there " . Because what make our life wonderful and meaningful is having others around . It a " waste land " we are living in today . A very nice blog Mishaikh . Have a nice day :)
- Mishaikh > hayat :) July 31, 2019 12:59
  
  It is very true Rosemay. I have written number of time on the topic, ALONE IN THE CORWD. (This is not the title but a gist of my blogs on the topic.)
  
  I appreciate your kind attention towards me as always.

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