Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh!

Hello muddah, Hello fadduh

Here I am at Camp Grenada.

Camp is very entertaining,

And they say we’ll have some fun if it stops raining.

I went hiking with Joe Spivey

He developed poison ivy;

You remember Leonard Skinner?

He got ptomaine poisoning last night after dinner.

All the counselors hate the waiters

And the lake has alligators.

And the head-coach wants no sissies,

So he reads to us from something called Ulysses

Now I don’t want this should scare ya,

But my bunk-mate has malaria;

You remember Jeffrey Hardy?

They’re about to organize a searching part.

Take me home, oh Muddah, fadduh.

Take me home, I hate Grenada.

Don’t leave me out in the forest where I might get eaten by a bear.

Take me home, I promise I will not make noise

Or mess the house with other boys.

Oh please don’t make me stay.

I’ve been here one whole day.

Dearest Fadduh, darling Muddah,

How is my presious little bruddah?

Let me come home if you miss me,

I would even let aunt Bertha hug and kiss me.

Wait a minute, it’s stopped hailing,

Guys are swimming, guys that’s better.

Muddah, Fadduh, kindly disregard this letter.

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