I think arranged or not-arranged by family is not necessarily the right question. Hopefully, in an arranged marriage, the families doing the arranging understand many of the hopes, dreams, and beliefs of both people, which should increase the liklihood of success. Also, I think usually their social and educational experiences will have been similar, which can also be important. But marriages can have hurdles regardless of how they began, so very important is that long-tem objectives are similar and that both parties are reasonably "mature" at the time of matching. I think physical attraction is wonderful, but... should not be the number one criteria, and if too young or immature, it often is the driving force for a union, and later, a divorce. There needs to be more than attraction in common!
I feel one should not delay marriage on materialistic goals.
Arranged or love marriage one should basically respect, and develop unconditional love.
Love conquers boredom of marriage , or be it any other relationship as friends /siblings etc.Another point I like to highlight
there is nothing called a perfect marriage , there are ups and downs , that is what makes an union worth while. Striving to make the best of it .
Hello Dreamer Man, Wherever we look at it... it has it's two sides. This idea will always depend on ones beliefs and practices. I see nothing wrong if the practice changed in one way or another, let's face it I think it's just leading there. But, the turning point will always have a dreadful (sometimes, bloody) effect in people's lives. This is expected because each individual will have to adjust in his/her own way. I think, even if they are couple each of them is still a separate entity. There is no perfect relationship but there is always peaceful agreement or compromise. Dreamer man, I think you are preparing a red carpet huh! Lucky your lady. Good luck! -Lynne-
Yes Anele that would be nice but not in all way it happen like this , there is many arranged marriage was failed beacuse the two partner have maybe difference though and not same Dream and not same level !!
@Ida : same here in my country too if you know someone good than you can ask him if he has a girl in his family that he think she is good and maybe later they can organize a weeding but not in all case too because in one family you can find someone good and his brother or sister not good , as we say ( the fingers in one hand are not same ...)
Dear susanto : he is very lucky to be hapy cos i have cousine who did the same and his co worker showed him his daughter but she was all the time sick and they hide her sickness at him and never get up from her bedroom ,so he divorced her in one year
Dear Teacher Anne : here is another topic and intersting as mix marriage from two different culture as turkish and german and I thnk this kinda of marriage is too much hard and can not agree each other as they have different culture and tradition and also religion sometimes !!! we should write a blog about mix marriage and see the positive side and negative side , thnks Teahcer that so interesting ..
well , sometimes it can be right and sometimes wrong , nowdays time are changed people can know each other by chance like at the super market or on the net or by accident those can accept whatever will happen cos they have chose their partner but some family chose for their daughters or their sons but is this way realy safe and good way !! what if the girl dont like the man or the man dont liek the girl so later they will blame their parents for chosing them a wrong partner !! what do yu think??
@Dear Teacher Anne :it doesnt matter the woman is educated or no but if the girl accept this way of marriage ??
well In my point of view.......It's not good for those who are getting marrige .....because usually it seems that people get married without seeing their partner....whom they don't know and never seen before....this is because their family elders fix their marriage and don't ask them....Now my point is that how can we live whole life with whom we don' know......i agree with that after marrige some people settled in good way...bt it happens rarely. and we have right to stay live with our aspiration we have liberty to doing anything that is not illegal only.......so I mean to say that if we are getting marriage so we need to understand our partner and also know about their nature, thought, etc...if both agree then after marriage could be succesfull........
Comments
you are right :)
I think arranged or not-arranged by family is not necessarily the right question. Hopefully, in an arranged marriage, the families doing the arranging understand many of the hopes, dreams, and beliefs of both people, which should increase the liklihood of success. Also, I think usually their social and educational experiences will have been similar, which can also be important. But marriages can have hurdles regardless of how they began, so very important is that long-tem objectives are similar and that both parties are reasonably "mature" at the time of matching. I think physical attraction is wonderful, but... should not be the number one criteria, and if too young or immature, it often is the driving force for a union, and later, a divorce. There needs to be more than attraction in common!
Arranged or love marriage one should basically respect, and develop unconditional love.
Love conquers boredom of marriage , or be it any other relationship as friends /siblings etc.Another point I like to highlight
there is nothing called a perfect marriage , there are ups and downs , that is what makes an union worth while. Striving to make the best of it .
yes you are right Anele but that was in the past nowdays most of couple i see they divorce soon why is that??
I agree with you Lynne , right now my red carpet is not ready :D , waiting for that lady to come and will prepare for her a sweet red carpet ;)
Wherever we look at it... it has it's two sides. This idea will always depend on ones beliefs and practices. I see nothing wrong if the practice changed in one way or another, let's face it I think it's just leading there. But, the turning point will always have a dreadful (sometimes, bloody) effect in people's lives. This is expected because each individual will have to adjust in his/her own way. I think, even if they are couple each of them is still a separate entity.
There is no perfect relationship but there is always peaceful agreement or compromise.
Dreamer man, I think you are preparing a red carpet huh! Lucky your lady.
Good luck!
-Lynne-
Yes Anele that would be nice but not in all way it happen like this , there is many arranged marriage was failed beacuse the two partner have maybe difference though and not same Dream and not same level !!
@Ida : same here in my country too if you know someone good than you can ask him if he has a girl in his family that he think she is good and maybe later they can organize a weeding but not in all case too because in one family you can find someone good and his brother or sister not good , as we say ( the fingers in one hand are not same ...)
Dear susanto : he is very lucky to be hapy cos i have cousine who did the same and his co worker showed him his daughter but she was all the time sick and they hide her sickness at him and never get up from her bedroom ,so he divorced her in one year
Dear Teacher Anne : here is another topic and intersting as mix marriage from two different culture as turkish and german and I thnk this kinda of marriage is too much hard and can not agree each other as they have different culture and tradition and also religion sometimes !!! we should write a blog about mix marriage and see the positive side and negative side , thnks Teahcer that so interesting ..
well , sometimes it can be right and sometimes wrong , nowdays time are changed people can know each other by chance like at the super market or on the net or by accident those can accept whatever will happen cos they have chose their partner but some family chose for their daughters or their sons but is this way realy safe and good way !! what if the girl dont like the man or the man dont liek the girl so later they will blame their parents for chosing them a wrong partner !! what do yu think??
@Dear Teacher Anne :it doesnt matter the woman is educated or no but if the girl accept this way of marriage ??