ESL Discussion

To give or not to give?

Posted by Risty (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ on December 28, 2016 in General Discussion

"Money has different names !!! In church its called (offering), in school its (fee), in marriage it's called (dowry), in divorce (alimony), when u owe someone its (debt ), when u pay the government (tax), in court (fines), civil servant retirees (pension) boss to workers (salary), master to subordinates (wages), when u borrow from bank (loan), when u offer after a service (tip), to kidnappers (ransom), illegally received in d name of service (bribe).

The question is "when a Husband gives it to his Wife what do we call it??"
- mamafunky (http://www.nairaland.com)

In my country and tradition, it is normal to give the whole salary to the wife and let her do the overall budgeting. But of course, norms are continuously changing, there are some couples who divide the expenses by two and let the other half pay for what he/she obliges to, this happens because both parties are working and earning their own monies.

How about in your country and tradition? Do you have something like this?
Do you think the amount of your salary is in your discretion if you will reveal or not?
For husbands, Is it okay to give your salary to your wife?
For wife, are you willing to do the budgeting and are you practicing this at home?
For singles, what do you think about this arrangement in case you would like to marry in the future?

Additionally, financial aspect is one of the reasons why some marriage doesn't work.

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Tags: arrangement, marriage, money, opinion
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Replies

  • Mishaikh January 5, 2017 1:20


    Mishaikh said:
    You encouraged me, Danny, to tell the truth. The salaries my wife has/ had been earning always happened to be more than double than mine then it became double. I never felt any complex against my wife, rather I felt satisfied and secured that my kid got higher education because of my wife, I simply ran the core of household.

    Here in the USA my wife again earning enough, and I am doing nothing. But again I do not have any complex and feel proud to have her beside me facing all the hardship of our life.

    Thanks, Danny and Risty, too.



    Danny Clark said:

    Dear Risty! You know that I like taking part in your discussions and I hope you will kindly allow me to express my mind here.

    Well, you are very right when you say that many couples  break up because of the financial problems. But those problems may be different from what you imagine. So, first of all, I will answer your questions.

    1. Any man who has long-term relationship with a woman ought to provide her at least for living she is used to have or make it better. Otherwise, she will start looking for other sourses.

    2. My wife knows my annnual income and I know hers. It is not a problem if people have enough money. Anyway, all our incomes are fixed by net and there is no reason to hide anything. In the case of our divorce, all our savings will be 'diggged out" by our lawers. In fact, I give my salary to my wife as we have one joint account for our salaries. But we also have separate accounts and it is good as we both feel safe and confident.

    3. I do like my wife planning our expenses as I don't usually have enough time for taking care of our house.

    4. At last, I'd like to tell you that a woman often happens to earn more, to be more tallented, succesful, wealthy. So, what should men do in this case? To accept and encourage her, to make her feel bad because of her being on the top or to leave her and to find a "regular" one? As to me, I have answered this question long ago: I prefer to share my life with a smart mature wonam who consideres me to be her best friend and she is right, because I am.

    To give or not to give?
    Money has different names !!! In church its called (offering), in school its (fee), in marriage it's called (dowry), in divorce (alimony), when u owe…
  • Mishaikh January 5, 2017 1:17


    Risty Aven said:

    Hello, Mish, your current state is very common now really, most women earn a lot, well. And it’s a good trait that you stay in your ground and never felt intimidated or inferior; for sure you’re kind of supportive that’s why you deserve a woman like her. So now, you run the household means all expenses are under your control? You decide for everything or only for major expenditures?

    Thank you so much for opening up your mind, tell me, why didn’t do that in your first comment? :D


    Mishaikh said:

    You encouraged me, Danny, to tell the truth. The salaries my wife has/ had been earning always happened to be more than double than mine then it became double. I never felt any complex against my wife, rather I felt satisfied and secured that my kid got higher education because of my wife, I simply ran the core of household.

    Here in the USA my wife again earning enough, and I am doing nothing. But again I do not have any complex and feel proud to have her beside me facing all the hardship of our life.

    Thanks, Danny and Risty, too.



    To give or not to give?
    Money has different names !!! In church its called (offering), in school its (fee), in marriage it's called (dowry), in divorce (alimony), when u owe…
  • Danny Clark January 4, 2017 15:08

    Risty, dear! I hope you will write a great story about a monster and a Thumberlina who made him behave. It would be great! I can't wait!

  • Danny Clark January 4, 2017 15:00

    I have no idea, my dear! They are just coming out from the bottom of my heart!

    Risty Aven said:

    Tell me honestly, how did you perfect throwing those lines to a lady? As if words are simply flowing to your mind, and as if you know how a woman thinks, your practice really made you perfect for that Hahahahahaha! Your tricks won’t work me, hahaha! Kidding! But yes, he told me he’ll be needing me until forever, I’m not sure if I can still type, think and run during that time. Kidding!

    As to my future, I’m in high hopes he could transform himself into different forms…hahah! A real monster! And the monster has a master, how nice. As if I want to write a love story now. :D

    I'm imagining your Alpha wolfish grin now..hahaha

    To give or not to give?
    Money has different names !!! In church its called (offering), in school its (fee), in marriage it's called (dowry), in divorce (alimony), when u owe…
  • Danny Clark January 4, 2017 14:55

    Dear Mishaikh! I am not a medical doctor and I will never give any prescriptions here. What I told about is just a regular way to get rid of heartburn for healthy people. Sure, those who suffer from stomach ulcer or gastritis should see a physician as soon as possible.

  • Mishaikh January 4, 2017 14:40
    Be warned Dany, your recipe is not suitable for dudenal alcer or colitus patient, I am both.



    Danny Clark said:

    But as a chemist, I can give a nice recipe against heartburn for those who avoid taking pills. Put a half tea spoon of baking soda in  a half full glass of water, add a few drops of lemon juice, stir it, wait for bubbles and drink it up

    To give or not to give?
    Money has different names !!! In church its called (offering), in school its (fee), in marriage it's called (dowry), in divorce (alimony), when u owe…
  • Danny Clark January 4, 2017 14:38

    Mishaikh, yes! An imp is a little devil, but it is so cute!

  • Risty (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ January 4, 2017 14:37

    Oh no! I won't let my heart be burn, not this life or the other life. :D But the mixture looks tasty and inviting, thanks!

    Mishaikh said:

    Okay but the remedy is to be noted for future, heart is going to be burnt any way. LOL!





    To give or not to give?
    Money has different names !!! In church its called (offering), in school its (fee), in marriage it's called (dowry), in divorce (alimony), when u owe…
  • Danny Clark January 4, 2017 14:36

    But as a chemist, I can give a nice recipe against heartburn for those who avoid taking pills. Put a half tea spoon of baking soda in  a half full glass of water, add a few drops of lemon juice, stir it, wait for bubbles and drink it up

  • Mishaikh January 4, 2017 14:36
    Yep!


    Risty Aven said:


    A perfect description, right?
    Mishaikh said:

    IMP = a mischievous child
    but it is also used to express a 'little devil"!


    To give or not to give?
    Money has different names !!! In church its called (offering), in school its (fee), in marriage it's called (dowry), in divorce (alimony), when u owe…
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