The second time I got married, my wife's aunt brought a tub and went inside with me and my wife to witness the consummation of our marriage. I turned to my wife and whispered in her ear, "Why is she here? what is that big plate for?" My wife answered me that she was going to be with us to wash our feet together and then witness the first sexual intercourse between us. Of course, I disagreed at once and told her to tell her aunt to get out of the room. Then my wife brought a white scarf and put it under her. I didn't care about it and we finished our first night with screams and that red fluid came from her into that white cloth. Then my wife happily and proudly took that piece of cloth to her mother which she showed it to her neighbors and friends and relatives. I was shy when I knew about it. Basically, traditions, habits, and religions differ from one society to the other. In our communities, the chastity or virginity of the bride depends on her hymen. Her husband is the man who opens that membrane. Do you agree to have other people present on your first night of marriage? Does it mean absolute masculinity and feminity for both sides? What do you think? Is witnessing a consummation of marriage considered a strange tradition?
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Replies
Je ne sais pas Raptor. That was about twenty years ago, but the experience is very hard to forget. I mean for people to live in old centuries, it's something which you cannot comprehend. Thanks, Raptor for your comment!
Raptor said:
Kamu benar_benar teman ku. Saya benci nya banyak dan tidak mau begitu. I guess we should break and leave these old and shameful traditions. You are a good lady, Diah. Thanks, for your nice comment on that discussion!
Diah said:
Well thanks for sharing. I have ever read about this similar story but i thought it's just a hoax. But I just knowing it's real in your place. Hmm I can never imagine if that's happen to me because I totally disagree with this thing. It's like my privacy that no one may know about it. And for me, it's really strange tradition.. Sometimes you should break the tradition to follow the religion, as I think so.
Rosemary said:
rysperski said:
Oi there,
I wholeheartedly agree with Estanis about wives being in worse situation in such cases. Our society does not question the virginity of men, only women r tagged and victimized.
For instance, in most communities, if a man is very active sexually, even with other women than his legal wife/wives, he is acclaimed a real "macho" and will suffer no phisical punishment, on the other hand, though, a woman in this situation would be called a bitch in the best case.....not to mention other forms of castigation.
Of course, there will be a lot of people claiming that it is not so in their tribe, but that is only claiming....
Atleeshno Elvina! Me likewise, I do not like that act at all. The reason does not allow that let alone be the religion. As the previous lady, it's just perversion, sickness hypocrisy. Thanks, Elvina for your straight opinion!
Elvina said:
In such a tradition a strange thing is a witness who should stay with a bride and a groom. She is an odd person inside. I disagree with present of somebody at the first night of marriage.I don't like such a tradition.
Estoy de aquerdo contigu! I agree with you, my dear friend. This is bad. The morality of the wife is the morality of decency of the husband too. It's a tradition and a bad one, but it is used by sick people as you mentioned. Only sick people, my dear friend Ella. Thanks for your frank and direct comment.
ella said:
Estoy de aquerdo contigu! I agree with you, my dear friend. This is bad. The morality of the wife is the morality of decency of the husband too. It's a tradition and a bad one, but it is used by sick people as you mentioned. Only sick people, my dear friend Ella. Thanks for your frank and direct comment.
ella said:
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