Dear EC friends and for other members that are willing to share,
Could you please help me guys, how can I make people follow me? I didn't ask for such role but I don't know they thought I'm trustworthy (believe it or not, I don't think so), but since they thought so, I would like to give them what they deserve. I would like to show them at least a quarter of their expectation from me.
Now, how to become a good leader, given the fact that I will make people who are older than me, more professional than me, and more experience than me to follow/listen to me?
How? @.@
Scary.
Replies
Hello, Rosemary! You are right. This is not easy. I will try my best to be fair so help me God. Thanks for your support!
Rosemary said:
Hello, SaLeM! I think I better read some famous speaker...:D Thanks!
SaLeM said:
Hello again, Mr. David! You are an effective motivator and a positive influence to people, no sugar coating. Thanks a lot for your time to answer my queries and to be honest, I find them helpful and hopeful that somehow I can do these things for them.
About unworthy, well...how to explain that? I have a different definition of that maybe (I've told you that;) )..
Thanks a lot, and I wish you more power and strength!
David said:
Hello, Addel! I will keep that in mind too. :) Thanks!
Addel said:
Hello, Miss Paula! Now I know why you were chosen as a new moderator. I'm gonna absorb your advice and they are all positive so no disagreement here.
I would love to know how's your experience working with the public? I wish to read that someday...
Thanks a lot!
★ღ ˚ Paula✰ •* ˚ said:
TO me , I think when want people foillow or listen to you , this needs more effort in power of mind ( knowledge / wisdom ) and this means you should have features to make people do what what you want like some famous person in history that are called leaders ,fo course there are many examples for this reagrd .
Hi again Risty,
It's great to read your reply.
Somehow you have received and mistakenly believed a harmful and dangerous message: "most of them are unworthy individuals like me". Or, possibly I've misinterpreted your meaning of unworthy. Influential people have invited you to take up this position. If you were truly unworthy, you would not have been considered -- but you were, and most importantly, given the opportunity to show what you can do! You might not attain the ideals that others have, but please consciously ignore or dismiss thoughts of unworthiness particularly within yourself. Focus on your strengths: caring and concern for the welfare of others, mindfulness of your surroundings, ability and willingness to communicate, empathy and sensitivity. No one with these wonderful qualities could be considered "unworthy". Don't compare yourself with an ideal you can't reach yet. By all means, work to improve yourself, but work from the base of positivity and strength, not negativity and certainly not a feeling of worthlessness.
Further to the success with your group, the same idea applies. Every person has aspects of "worthiness". One of your important jobs is to recognise this yourself -- then praise them and make others aware that, as leader, you are working to build positive relationships within the group and map a positive course for the whole group.
"I don't know how to express myself in a way that my heart wants to." No one could always know the right things to say at the right time. This certainly doesn't mean that you are "unworthy"! You have a good heart and (I believe) good instincts to be helpful and trustworthy. In your new position, words are not as important as attitude, body language and over-all atmosphere you create around the group.
If you Google <esl positive reinforcement>, <esl positive thoughts> or similar, you will find plenty of words and phrases to use. With months of practise and experience, you will use more of this language naturally and more comfortably. For now, don't expect to be perfect; accept yourself and the mistakes of others (especially if you're all working in 2nd Language).
There is a lot of other helpful information in this discussion, particularly from...
★ღ ˚ Paula✰ •* ˚
When is your group starting? All the best!
Risty said:
Risty there has to be a reason you were chosen. Someone saw in you abilities that will be good for this group. Do not over think it. If you do.....you will cause trouble for yourself. Be fair, be kind, be serious, be diplomatic, be hard working. Know that all are not going to agree with you. Some may complain. Take into consideration the group you are over and what their needs are. I assume there are needs.....and their main concern will be their needs. You said above.....that this will mean their lives. That is why I say needs have to be there. I have worked with the public all of my life and it is not easy to change and meet each different personality. The main thing to me......is show how hard you work to make things better. That you are the one that will do all you know to help and be successful in this groups endeavor. Try to maintain a cool calm presence if possible. If you fall apart......so will your group. I hope this helped. I contemplated whether to comment or not. For I like you sometimes doubt my abilities. It is natural I think. Good Luck young lady......I wish you all the best!!!!!!
Hello, David! You are a big help to my situation, most of them are same as your age if I will just use that profile picture as my basis. Some of them are respectful oldies, educated bachelors, professionals couples, and most of them are unworthy individuals like me. You know I realize is that I'm truly concern about them, how're their lives going, are they ill somewhere, if they have a problem, or just simply is there something that is bothering them. The main problem is I don't know how to show that care, I don't know how to express myself in a way that my heart wants to.
I'm learning.
Thank you, David! It's so nice to read from you.
David said:
Hello, Mary! I'm teaching my face to make it stern when necessary, I also practice my gestures to be appropriate and parallel to what I supposed to say. I'd rather change that "fake" to "improving". Not that I will fake it because as much as possible I want to be sincere, not because I'm not yet but because it's not sufficient to convince people (esp. oldies), I guess. Thanks!
MARY said:
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