Mish, I think he is intimidating but I don’t find him rude, just like what you’ve said, maybe that is just his way of pushing someone to feel confident, just like the not-so-soft tap on my shoulder.
We are experiencing the same scenario in real life but unlike you, I’m no match for your writing skills. Your advice about finding some spheres that can help me out is really good, but I think they could be “like-minded” in the way of interest not in the level of proficiency because given a choice I will roam around with people who possessed a higher level of proficiency and confidence. In time, I will develop myself just like them, they will play the biggest part of it as my inspiration.
Mishaikh said:
Risty, Jeffery is not a rude guy, though he tones so, I personally take it as his style. So do not mind much.
Secondly, I also thinks this as a matter of confidence as Luci said. I am faster in writing in English, but I am almost zero in speaking, may be having no confidence in myself or may be I never find gathering around me who are interested in speaking English, may be we all have inferiority complex in this respect. That is why I always advise all learners that if they want to learn speaking they should have group of like minded friends and speak with them English.
Do you agree or disagree that the large part of the problem we experience with improving our speaki…
Luci dear, yes you’re right it’s a matter of self-confidence. Practice makes perfect as saying goes, but talk, talk and talk is eerie to me..haha!The creeps get into my nerves.haha!
Do you think Skype talk will be beneficial for me to expand and extend my knowledge and learning? Should I consider to maintain one?
And yes, yes! I’m not comfortable in speaking things that I don’t know in the language that I’m not good at.
Luci said:
Risty dear, this issue is about self-confidence and the question is...How to get healthy self-confidence? As for English, you must practise of course. You have to talk and talk and talk. If you want to, we can have some conversation on Skype. The thing is that you must feel comfortable when it comes to speaking and not nervous and just think..omggg what the hell I am talking bullshits :D Take it easy and just talk and talk (even with yourself) :p
Do you agree or disagree that the large part of the problem we experience with improving our speaki…
Sir Jeff, hope everything is well with you. No worries, in a way my brain was triggered because of your statement, thanks to you.
No problem, I’m alright now, I overcame that feeling after some meaningful reads, I just have to refresh from time to time. :) .Thanks for appreciating my thoughts and to your unbiased judgment on my communication skills, it helps a lot...inertly of this being of mine.
Based on your third paragraph, I think it is vital to establish someone’s psychological capacity to learn new things, this will smoothen the process of learning. I find it hard to penetrate one’s cognitive area on learning a new language if there are blockages in their way like shyness, intimidation, speaking defects, mispronunciations etc. etc., if there’s something hindering them from learning in a more persuasive way, the act of learning will never be put to good use.
Thanks, you know Sir, really, I find it difficult to converse in English especially when the other person is a Native English Speaker with an Aussie accent. :D
Risty, Jeffery is not a rude guy, though he tones so, I personally take it as his style. So do not mind much.
Secondly, I also thinks this as a matter of confidence as Luci said. I am faster in writing in English, but I am almost zero in speaking, may be having no confidence in myself or may be I never find gathering around me who are interested in speaking English, may be we all have inferiority complex in this respect. That is why I always advise all learners that if they want to learn speaking they should have group of like minded friends and speak with them English.
Risty Aven said:
:D Felino, see? I was so anxious and intimidated. Your right, it’s like those days, and makes things worse, saying things which I don’t understand. Teacher be like “what are you sayin’? are you still with us?” :D:D:D
There is another scenario of asking one’s question, for example, I really don’t know about something and I’m asking because I don’t know and I want to know about it. How can I possibly give an opinion to that? As one quotes said;
“We learn more by looking for the answer to a question and not finding it than we do from learning the answer itself.” – Lloyd Alexander
Actually, the question came from the book I read, according to that book “over the years many learners of English desperately want to improve their speaking and listening skills but through deep belief planted earlier in their lives they think that they will need is more grammar and correction.”
You mentioned the word “confident”, so it means you agree that this is psychological rather than linguistic?
And, thanks, Mary, in some ways, indirectly you’re telling me not to feel inferior.
Do you agree or disagree that the large part of the problem we experience with improving our speaki…
Risty dear,
this issue is about self-confidence and the question is...How to get healthy self-confidence? As for English, you must practise of course. You have to talk and talk and talk. If you want to, we can have some conversation on Skype. The thing is that you must feel comfortable when it comes to speaking and not nervous and just think..omggg what the hell I am talking bullshits :D Take it easy and just talk and talk (even with yourself) :p
:D Felino, see? I was so anxious and intimidated. Your right, it’s like those days, and makes things worse, saying things which I don’t understand. Teacher be like “what are you sayin’? are you still with us?” :D:D:D
There is another scenario of asking one’s question, for example, I really don’t know about something and I’m asking because I don’t know and I want to know about it. How can I possibly give an opinion to that? As one quotes said;
“We learn more by looking for the answer to a question and not finding it than we do from learning the answer itself.” – Lloyd Alexander
Actually, the question came from the book I read, according to that book “over the years many learners of English desperately want to improve their speaking and listening skills but through deep belief planted earlier in their lives they think that they will need is more grammar and correction.”
You mentioned the word “confident”, so it means you agree that this is psychological rather than linguistic?
And, thanks, Mary, in some ways, indirectly you’re telling me not to feel inferior.
Ugh Risty, I can feel anxiety just reading you! You reminded me my school days when the teacher was asking something and I hadn't any clue what to say or how to say it :D
I admit it also gets me on my nerves when people just ask questions without showing their own opinion first, but anyway... What I understand for what you tried to explain in your reply here is that... erm... you should just calm down! haha C'mon! noone here is 'inferior'! People can be more or less skilled learning something, or being more or less good expressing their points of views... but never say someone is 'superior' or 'inferior' for being better or worse in a subject. Learning a language takes time and that process is different for everyone, that's all. Once you feel confident enough, you'll find everything more 'easy' :)
Thank you, Mr. Jeffrey, for such unusual kick-off..:)I should affirm to your statement, I should have done this earlier, hope I will be forgiven. :)
I agree with this, and to one point I disagree simultaneously, my point for my disagreement is, it should not be limited to speaking and listening, writing should come to the picture too. Right now, this very moment, I feel like avoiding and aborting this discussion, I even thought to delete this, because I'm not expecting this words "but then you sit on the sidelines and ask others to express their opinions"... I'm an introvert, I thought posting this will help me to read some views from people, I love reading mode, I'm totally inferior and has a very poor logical skills, just now..I'm still thinking what to say to you, Mr. Jeff, I'm thinking, I want to write something that will not sound rude, not funny, not so serious, I want this to be light... but I find it very hard for me.
In reality, I don't talk a lot especially if the other person is so intimidating... I feel that there's nothing sensible will come to my mind and say, that the other person will never find me interesting enough to stand even a fifteen minutes conversation. :(... When I feel the fear of talking I'm starting to forget what I suppose to say, I started to buckle, to stammer... and it happened most of the time.
I really feel bad when I really want to voice my opinion but just can't seem to put it in words.-I read this somewhere and it is really, really true to my case.
So, that's it...words won't come out because I don't know know what to say and how to say...
Thank you, it took me 20 minutes to finish this... Good night.
Replies
I will be back with my opinion later.. ^_^
Good topic..!!
Mish, I think he is intimidating but I don’t find him rude, just like what you’ve said, maybe that is just his way of pushing someone to feel confident, just like the not-so-soft tap on my shoulder.
We are experiencing the same scenario in real life but unlike you, I’m no match for your writing skills. Your advice about finding some spheres that can help me out is really good, but I think they could be “like-minded” in the way of interest not in the level of proficiency because given a choice I will roam around with people who possessed a higher level of proficiency and confidence. In time, I will develop myself just like them, they will play the biggest part of it as my inspiration.
Mishaikh said:
Luci dear, yes you’re right it’s a matter of self-confidence. Practice makes perfect as saying goes, but talk, talk and talk is eerie to me..haha!The creeps get into my nerves.haha!
Do you think Skype talk will be beneficial for me to expand and extend my knowledge and learning? Should I consider to maintain one?
And yes, yes! I’m not comfortable in speaking things that I don’t know in the language that I’m not good at.
Luci said:
Sir Jeff, hope everything is well with you. No worries, in a way my brain was triggered because of your statement, thanks to you.
No problem, I’m alright now, I overcame that feeling after some meaningful reads, I just have to refresh from time to time. :) .Thanks for appreciating my thoughts and to your unbiased judgment on my communication skills, it helps a lot...inertly of this being of mine.
Based on your third paragraph, I think it is vital to establish someone’s psychological capacity to learn new things, this will smoothen the process of learning. I find it hard to penetrate one’s cognitive area on learning a new language if there are blockages in their way like shyness, intimidation, speaking defects, mispronunciations etc. etc., if there’s something hindering them from learning in a more persuasive way, the act of learning will never be put to good use.
Thanks, you know Sir, really, I find it difficult to converse in English especially when the other person is a Native English Speaker with an Aussie accent. :D
Risty, Jeffery is not a rude guy, though he tones so, I personally take it as his style. So do not mind much.
Secondly, I also thinks this as a matter of confidence as Luci said. I am faster in writing in English, but I am almost zero in speaking, may be having no confidence in myself or may be I never find gathering around me who are interested in speaking English, may be we all have inferiority complex in this respect. That is why I always advise all learners that if they want to learn speaking they should have group of like minded friends and speak with them English.
Risty Aven said:
this issue is about self-confidence and the question is...How to get healthy self-confidence? As for English, you must practise of course. You have to talk and talk and talk. If you want to, we can have some conversation on Skype. The thing is that you must feel comfortable when it comes to speaking and not nervous and just think..omggg what the hell I am talking bullshits :D Take it easy and just talk and talk (even with yourself) :p
:D Felino, see? I was so anxious and intimidated. Your right, it’s like those days, and makes things worse, saying things which I don’t understand. Teacher be like “what are you sayin’? are you still with us?” :D:D:D
There is another scenario of asking one’s question, for example, I really don’t know about something and I’m asking because I don’t know and I want to know about it. How can I possibly give an opinion to that? As one quotes said;
“We learn more by looking for the answer to a question and not finding it than we do from learning the answer itself.” – Lloyd Alexander
Actually, the question came from the book I read, according to that book “over the years many learners of English desperately want to improve their speaking and listening skills but through deep belief planted earlier in their lives they think that they will need is more grammar and correction.”
You mentioned the word “confident”, so it means you agree that this is psychological rather than linguistic?
And, thanks, Mary, in some ways, indirectly you’re telling me not to feel inferior.
Ugh Risty, I can feel anxiety just reading you! You reminded me my school days when the teacher was asking something and I hadn't any clue what to say or how to say it :D
I admit it also gets me on my nerves when people just ask questions without showing their own opinion first, but anyway... What I understand for what you tried to explain in your reply here is that... erm... you should just calm down! haha C'mon! noone here is 'inferior'! People can be more or less skilled learning something, or being more or less good expressing their points of views... but never say someone is 'superior' or 'inferior' for being better or worse in a subject. Learning a language takes time and that process is different for everyone, that's all. Once you feel confident enough, you'll find everything more 'easy' :)
Thank you, Mr. Jeffrey, for such unusual kick-off..:)I should affirm to your statement, I should have done this earlier, hope I will be forgiven. :)
I agree with this, and to one point I disagree simultaneously, my point for my disagreement is, it should not be limited to speaking and listening, writing should come to the picture too. Right now, this very moment, I feel like avoiding and aborting this discussion, I even thought to delete this, because I'm not expecting this words "but then you sit on the sidelines and ask others to express their opinions"... I'm an introvert, I thought posting this will help me to read some views from people, I love reading mode, I'm totally inferior and has a very poor logical skills, just now..I'm still thinking what to say to you, Mr. Jeff, I'm thinking, I want to write something that will not sound rude, not funny, not so serious, I want this to be light... but I find it very hard for me.
In reality, I don't talk a lot especially if the other person is so intimidating... I feel that there's nothing sensible will come to my mind and say, that the other person will never find me interesting enough to stand even a fifteen minutes conversation. :(... When I feel the fear of talking I'm starting to forget what I suppose to say, I started to buckle, to stammer... and it happened most of the time.
I really feel bad when I really want to voice my opinion but just can't seem to put it in words.-I read this somewhere and it is really, really true to my case.
So, that's it...words won't come out because I don't know know what to say and how to say...
Thank you, it took me 20 minutes to finish this... Good night.