This is the first time I try to make a poem. I hope I am not too far away.
The bells are ringing
calling closed doors to open
the child does not want milk
tears won't dry
The bells are ringing
Many of them are afraid
Nights are long
The cry of that child is so loud
They want survival, who cares?
The bells are ringing
hungry birds fly helplessly
in the cloudy sky
The space is not enough
Weak wings stop to flutter
The bells are ringing
Tears are still dropping
But their shouts still linger
In that cloudy sky
The widows sing silently and
The bells are ringing
Comments
Bahut bahut shukriya mera dost, Trance! Honestly, and frankly, from you and the other members things are going well. I will try to avoid the mistakes and as Mr. Bill Vortz said, I should make rhyming with the stanza. Thanks, Trance for your helpful comment!
Shookran bizzaf ya Bill! It seems that you are a poet. I do not know about stanza and how to organize my poem, but I will follow your advice. Thanks again!
Merci beaucoup mon ami. So far, I am excited to go on, but the rhyming, how can I be good at it? Nevertheless, thanks for your encouraging words.
Nice poem, Gino. It has some implications behind it as it portray the ringing bells in every happening event. One advice, Gino. Just work on the rhyming of the stanza but I find this first poem of yours creative with a vivid imagination. Nice work !
Teskkur ederim Batuhan! I am afraid of the grave, batu. I am doing my best to avoid its torment and suffering. Ask Allah, I pass it. It's either a hole from hell or a garden from paradise. Thanks, Batuhan for your time commenting and liking!
Bahut shukriya Ashwin! I feel shy a little bit because it's my first attempt on poems. Thanks, for your kind encouragement.
Awwwh, I loved this one.
It was so beautiful and sweet.
Everything flowed very well and the imagery was a joy to read.
As always, a wonderful job.
Shgotum Bet, donnobad! Thanks for your two words comment.
very true.....
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