He fell down on the snow covered ground backward. A piece of snow between his neck and collar was annoying him. For a moment he thought that how much he hates the steam that was coming out of his mouth, although when he was a child, it was so exciting for him to watch it. It was one of his hobbies to breathe deeply near the glass of the window with his younger brother and then starting to write their names and draw with their fingers on it. He felt a light heat on his thigh but did not pay attention to it, because the most important thing for him in that moment was his knife. He started to look for his knife, but it was impossible for him to stand up… exhausted… cold… grey… so just looked at his around… it was not there… then looked at the snow covered hill that he fell down from it… nothing… except blood in a white background… whose blood was that? Then he felt that light heat on his thigh again, but not just heat this time… heat with pain… he put his head on the ground again… the snow was melting among his hairs… the sky was grey, the sun behind the clouds was like a silver shining pill… maybe the knife sank into the snow… he closed his eyes and winced… cold… thirsty… then he felt something in his right hand… opened his eyes quickly and checked… it was his knife, in all those moments it was in his hand… bleeding… then he looked at his thigh and saw the bleeding scab of the bite… he heard their voice again… breathing… looking him… he knelt…hardly… he was not alone…
“Once more into the fray,
Into the last good fight I’ll ever know,
Live and die on this day,
Live and die on this day…”
[When I watched "THE GREY", something like this post came to my mind, so I wrote it. Great movie… the poem under the photos is by the director, Joe Carnahan …]
You need to be a member of MyEnglishClub to add comments!
Comments
Oh yes Behrad, i remembered now. Sorry for my bad memory. I want to tell you that i watched the movie the last weekend and i have to say that it is an amazing movie! Very touching! And the end is something different than we used to see. Actually i want to believe that he killed the wolf. I want to believe that he survived.
Thanks to the guys who LIKED this blog.
Blessing, I'm glad you wrote here something, thanks for your words, I'll try my best:)
saba, you told me a short beneficial sentence, thank you...
MARY, yes, you are absolutely right!!! Actually the main reason of this overusing is that I think when I put (.) at the end of the sentence, I am saying to the reader that the sentence is over, which I really don't like! I think when I put (...) at the end, I am saying to the reader that:"Hey! It is not over! You can think more about it, you can think and find out the main feeling, the main point and the main reason behind this sentence!"
I know if we write something valuable and in a right way, it makes no difference to use (.) or (...)! But, you know... old habits die hard!
About that writer whom you said his name, I will try to know more about him.
Thank you MARY.
Elen, thanks for the time that you spent on this blog:)
well done Behrad. you write very nice. I think you can be a great novelist.
Beautifully written.
Nice written Behrad!
I'm also glad to find that I'm not the only one overusing the ellipsis! (...) :D
I try to avoid that sometimes; but then I think to myself: 'wth! I like this way!'. Probably it happens to you the same, right? :)
This reminded me to one of my favorite writers, David Foster Wallace (one of the last best american writers) and his writing style. It was very interesting because he usually overused the footnotes. Most of his articles have several footnotes, and many of them so long that take up two or three pages. I guess he never cared anybody saying: 'hey! you overuse the footnotes!' haha... It was part of his writing style. And ellipsis are part of our style! ;)
I felt like i was reading a novel. Really great job! Keep doing it, you have talent!
-
1
-
2
of 2 Next