After I finished writing my latest blog about my experiences on main chat room, I read this term: cyber-bullying on a local newspaper. Somehow, I noticed that this term is suitable to describe some rude behaviors that I saw on my virtual life whether on MyEC, Facebook, etc.
What is cyber-bullying?
Well, cyber-bullying as explained on Wikipedia is when people use technology such as Internet to do or support hostile or rude actions like humiliating, abusing, intimidating, etc. Some people think that cyber-bullying more harmful than physical bullying since people can hide their true identities when they are online and because of that, they act beyond cultural or law limitations that they have in their real life.
Source: maxkeylogger.net
The reason I write this blog post is that because I see cyber-bullying is also happening in MyEC. But, some people are not aware of it, especially they who are not familiar with cyber life. I want to share several things that people did to me and some of my close friends including our mistakes in the past. My purpose is to warn new members to be ready to protect themselves.
If you read my previous blog, I mentioned trolls. People who wrote controversial and rude statement and they did that because they wanted to fight. I think it's the most obvious ones, but sadly some people still get fed up with the trolls' action.
A complicated cyber-bullying
I also think people already know about members who try to sexually abuse other members. So, I don't think I need to give you more examples. But, there is one tricky problem that some people might not aware about it. I give you an example. It was happening on other website that I followed. There was a male member there who trying to approach one of my closest female friends. She and I trusted him because he acted nice on public chat room. Well, after that she shared to me and other friends that he tried to flirt her. She asked him to stop, but he didn't stop.
Apparently, my other female friend complained the same thing about the same person. When both of them rejected him, he didn't stop. He tried to change their minds, so they would like to accept him as their "boyfriend". When they insisted and kept rejecting him, he started to intimidate them in private chat, and Skype. When it didn't work either, he started to humiliate them on public chat room.
Why it was complicated
Sadly, they didn't take screenshots when he was being rude to them in private chat. They didn't even think to report him. Let me tell you how he humiliated them and why no one who online that moment realized about it.
In one fight in private chat, he accused one of my female friends as a cheater and liar because she didn't want to be his girlfriend. Next day, when they met on main chat room he intentionally brought a topic about it. "What do you think about a cheater?" he asked other members. It seems like a normal topic, right? And no one noticed about it. Sometimes, he also shared some video music on public chat room when he saw one of them was chatting there. Everyone else would think that they were just video music, but the lyrics were actually related with one of his intimidation in private chats. And the video music was intended as a form of humiliation and intimidation as well.
It put my friends on dilemma. They didn't take screenshots as proves proofs, and they didn't want to tell anyone because it was embarrassing thing for them. It was also put me in difficult situation. I wanted to help them, but it was not easy to collect some proves proofs that strong enough to kick him out from the website.
Sadly, I still see some people are using the same method as he did. Luckily, not all of them are as smart as he was. They can't help themselves to humiliate female members who rejected them with rude words. It's easier to catch them.
Did you ever experienced similar things like my friends had? Or did you have other experiences of cyber-bullying? If yes, I'd like to read your stories. Who knows that it would help other members and inspire them to protect themselves.
PS: Again, don't feel hesitant to correct any of grammatical error in this blog post.
Further information:
Comments
Hi Smile,
Now I write your name correctly. Well, actually talking bad about a person or some people (especially if they mention a name or names) is other form of bullying even if it is done for a good purpose like what you mentioned, to warn others. If the people who talk bad, cannot show any proofs, then what they do is called slandering, gossiping or spreading rumor. If they can show any proofs, then what they do is public humiliation. Both are not accepted in MyEC since these actions will not create a positive environment for people to learn and teach English.
And I think we should be careful not to be involved in these behaviors. It is because if someone help them spread the info and apparently, they cannot backup their stories or apparently it is a huge lie, then the person will be in serious problem. People will lost their trusts and probably will keep distance because they are afraid that the person will "victimize" them.
It is better to take screenshots and make reports to the admins or moderators, if you see people act "disgusting". It will be helpful to create a better environment.
lol, Ohnie...I think I will create a discussion about that..and see how other members deal with those rude members.
Yeah, someone has to write it, Ranu. But not me! I'm too brutal, hahah. I'm afraid I'll be censored. LOL!
I think that's interesting topic to discuss. I mean how members here deal with rude members. I think one of us need to write about this topic. Different ways to deal with cyber bullies. It could help new members to protect themselves better. And long-term members could learn as well :)
Hmm...well, I guess different strokes for different folks, Syu. I don't know, some people just don't get it!
Hey, once an Indonesian guy came to my private, but I just said "Doh! Bye" and left :S
I didn't do what you did Ohnie :S Maybe I should do that next time... Eww, hope there won't be next time ^^
Oh, one more thing, Ranu correct me if I am wrong because my memory is not so well :P but there was a girl did like what you did Ohnie and the result was other girls blamed her instead :O
I knew you were gonna say that. So here you go...my Christmas peace offering.
Natal Di Hatiku
I tried hard, heheh!
@Ohnie
:P I need some compensation to get over it, Ohnie
I did? Me? Oh, well, you just need to get over it, Ranu, heheh!
@Ohnie
Lol. I think it was you, Ohnie who bullied me. Yes, I see some female members did like the way you did. But, I guess some male members here smart enough not to start that kind of conversation here. I wonder if we can report them here if they do that on Skype or Facebook.
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