Talking about getting married may bring you many thoughts. We are not talking about the preparation of yourselves to be ready to live with your partner but the conditions for marriage in different generations.
In some cultures, marry a virgin is one of the most necessary conditions that leads to so many problems in the life of the bride and bridegroom. As the men’s mindset was set with a traditional thought that the girl who has lost her virgin is a bad girl and not worth for getting married. That is really unfair for women who just believed so much in love and gave “the most precious thing” to their lovers. Nowadays, women’s rights are recognized and people talk more about marriage equality. That is why many other conditions appear as human’s desire is endless.
Of all times, the parents whose children are at the age of being ready for marriage will care a lot about similarity of social background between bride and bridegroom's families. They want to seek for the best suitable one for their children to marry. Some might think that love is not really as necessary as other things such as money, social ranks, and education background, etc. which affect the most on marriage life. That is either right or wrong because marriage is something really complicated to talk about when people’s attitude towards its life is one of the most important factors. It is not unreasonable to say that we should marry a person whose condition is much better than the other since he can guarantee your children’s future with his or her certain advantages. Although people usually think that living with the person they love is the best, they would get confused as life doesn’t go the way they thought. Therefore, at some points, people still consider about whom to get married to, what they are like, how rich they are and so on, especially the parents whose children are willing to have their own families.
In short, getting married is the most important part in your life. Put in it a lot of wisdom, love, and generosity will be the worth advice including hard working to get to a certain financial state which helps increase the marriage life’s quality and the future. Last but not least, follow your heart and you will find the way to do the best for your life.
Comments
pregnant before marriage!!!!!I'm sure it is not good for girls.we must change some traditions.
Hihihi... Anele mom, you may scare all of the suitors around me :D but I love that, I don't like those guys who approach me without a certain willing to deal with your challenges :D
I didn't say that I prefer the choice of becoming pregnant before marriage. There's nothing to be sure about the wedding for pregnant women, not to say virginity is still a matter in my country's culture. But as a common girl, I have my own thoughts about this. I am now almost 26, no longer young to let all this slide away, but not old enough to decide what is right to do. But I would try my best to be wise and see who is really the right man for me. I wonder where he is now. Maybe this mood brings me lots of wondering about all those stuff :)
Hehehe, my dear, I will be single in at least 4 years to come. Even I look innocent and inexperienced as you see, I don't think I would be swept of my feet easily and early. So, time to enjoy my rest singleness as much as I can :)
Thank you, my dear for your lovely comment.
Nooo... you are still a baby! I have to scrutinize first the personality of all your suitors before You are given in marriage, hehehe.
Well, you said that men were after fertile women who assured themselves that they would tie the knot only with preggy women. Hmmm, would you say that they are better than those who run away after getting their GFs pregnant? Between the lesser evils, I know you would choose the first type.
I hate to see you being given away, my baby Scarlett. You still look so innocent and inexperienced. Maybe 3 or 5 years can still wait, eh?
By the way, in my previous comment, I meant to say "losing" not "loosing". Thanks for your reply, dear!
@ Mishaikh: Thanks a lot for your correction.
@ Anele:
My dear Anele, I'm so happy to see you commenting on my blog. That's so kind of you to welcome me back here.
Yes, I'm at the age of getting married yet I'm not ready for it. I do agree with everything you said. As my observation, people now are not being really strict about virginity. They even want to make sure that the partner must have the fertility, I mean I've heard that some guys might ask their partners to become pregnant first, and think about marriage latter because there are lots of couples now can't have babies when they get married. I don't agree with this issue. Why don't they use medical option to check. But after all, I think, at some senses, people have their destiny so being faithful in the relationship would be the most important issue.
Thank you for your wise words and kindness as usual :)
@ Shiva: Thanks for your comment.
@ Cup Cake: Yes, I agree with you in that matter. Virginity is not something to judge or label what someone is like. Maybe the American's style has affected many countries about that. In my opinion, people should not only be open-minded over the world but also keep the value of themselves. Be integrative, not soluble.
Hello Scarlett dear. Welcome back to the world of blogging. It's good to see you writing again. Are you contemplating of marrying? hehehe. I guess you are already at the right age, huh?
Keeping your virginity intact and only loosing it to someone you married will save you from an accusing finger in the future. This will not excuse a man from accusing you of bearing a child not of his own. Your confidence will be saved by earning your husband's high regard for being faithful to him. Young couple who are inexperienced when it comes to handling adult relationship can save their marriage by being faithful to each other.
On the other hand, virginity is no longer a big issue for matured adults. What matters most for them is the spiritual virginity which is more important than the physical virginity.
In selecting a partner, one should be wise enough to decide what future life you want to have. That's why some partners break up in the end because of a shallow foundation. Marriage is a binding knot that solidifies your "togetherness". A vow which makes the couple work out to keep the fire of their union forever burning.
BE VIRGIN
In some cultures, marry a virgin is one of the most necessary conditions that leads to so many problems in the life of the bride and bridegroom. As the men’s mindset was set with a traditional thought that the girl who has lost her virgin is a GIRL OF LOOSE CHARACTER and not worth for getting married. (This aspect prevails in all Eastern Societies). That is really unJUSTIFIED for women, BECAUSE THE SOCIETY OVERLOOKS THE MAN WHO WAS THE PARTER IN DAMAGING THE POOR GIRLS VIRGINITY who ONLY GOT TRAPPED by BELIEVING so much in love and gave “the most precious thing” to their lovers. In my opinion society should see the circumstances in prior to seeing the error.
CULTURAL EQUALITY:
Nowadays, women’s rights are recognized and people talk more about marriage equality. That is why many other conditions appear as human’s desire is endless.
Of all times, the parents whose children are at the age of being ready for marriage will care a lot about similarity of social background between bride and bridegroom's families. They want to seek for the best suitable one for their children to marry.
STRONG ECONOMICAL CONDITION:
Some might think that love is not really as necessary as other things such as money, social ranks, and education background, etc. which affect the most on marriage life. That is either right or wrong because marriage is something really complicated to talk about when people’s attitude towards life is one of the most important factors.
It is not unreasonable to say that we should marry a person whose condition is much better than the other since he can guarantee HIS/HER children’s future with his or her certain advantages.
LOVE:
Although people usually think that living with the person they love is the best, they would get confused as life doesn’t go the way they thought. Therefore, at some points, people still consider about whom to get married to, what they are like, how rich they are and so on, especially the parents whose children are willing to have their own families.
In short, getting married is the most important part in your life. Put in it a lot of wisdom, love, and generosity will be the worth advice including hard working to get to a certain financial state which helps increase the marriage life’s quality and the future.
FOLLOW YOUR HEART:
Last but not least, follow your heart and you will find the way to do the best for your life.
For comments on this blog I go with Cup Cake agreeing with her thoughts.
Well This is an amazing blog. Very balanced blog I should say. I do agree with your fact about virginity as it's a custom in my tradition as well. But unlike all the other traditions we don't call the girl a whore or anything it's just it's a dead custom in here. But in the other hand I don't like 15 year old girls giving everything to their boyfriend calling it true love. I don't like my country becoming another America in that matter. Or getting bullied from other high schools students for being a virgin. I think people should not judge anyone. Even if they're virgins or not they should not label people from their virginity or sexuality. My generation is messed up in that matter.